- Feeling “much older” than I am, as every task takes at least twice the time it used to take.
- Having a noticeable tremor that worsens at the most inopportune times, like when I’m going through airport security or addressing a crowd.
- Needing help with every day activities like putting on socks and shoes, and jewelry.
- Looking to strangers like I need assistance. A woman 15-plus years my senior and walking with a cane extended her arm to help me down from a high curb.
- Ordering food in restaurants based not on what I have a taste for, but rather on what I am least likely to end up wearing.
- Always feeling hot, so hot that I rarely wear a jacket, even in Chicago winters.
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- Being unable to walk the whole mall without multiple rest stops. This is doubly frustrating, as shopping has always been my “pick me up” sport.
- Fumbling for change with a line of people behind me.
- Enduring the pain of toe curling (dystonia), and the itchy, burning sensation in my feet.
- Knowing what the “end stage” is like and exhausting myself trying to outrun my fears.
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